Alleyway to the road not taken
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by-- "The Road Not Taken", Robert Frost.
I came looking for you knowing full well that I wouldn't find you. The others, they watched me walk in circles, lost in a room inside my head, they shrugged at my lifeless gaze and thought me crazy — not that it matters anymore to anyone.
Downtown, electric lights are still draped around the naked skeletons of trees. The other day, someone remarked to me that the lights could now be taken down given that Christmas is now over, but too many years of useless religious education made me say, "There are actually twelve days of Christmas and we're barely halfway."
And so the lights remain, poor untwinkling substitutes for leaves long-gone, forgotten along with the warm breath of summer. Or your warm kiss on my cheek.
I picked up a book in the bookshop and began to read. I skipped entire chapters, reading slices of sections until I tire of the plot. I mustn't buy books on a day like today. I avoided the music store. I was there two days ago and they didn't have what I was looking for; they probably wouldn't have it today. I walked past the café and realised I hadn't had a single drop of coffee all day. Could that be a reason for delirium?
They have cleared much snow off the streets. No longer softened by snow, the city reveals its sudden severity in concrete and stone. In the entrance to an alleyway that stretched off the main road, I met a little lost man. He looked at me forlornly and I managed a smile. He shook his head "no, I haven't seen him" and we bade each other good evening and farewell.
There are too many hours in a day. Too many with which to think, feel, fill with things to do, too many through which to live. And suddenly, it occurred to me that all significant things in my life happen between these spells of eternal walking. The mindless business of putting one foot in front of the other, the unending act of senselessly moving on, looking for the off-beaten path that would lead me back to you.
Posted by sniffles at December 30, 2003 10:32 PM